How To Be Awesome When Loved One's Hurt

For those of you who haven't been following along, ROW80 is a writing challenge that lets you set your own goals, and cheers you on as you work on reaching them! I recently had to change my goals because I realized that, for now, my focus needs to be elsewhere. And, following quickly on the heels of that decision, I got thrown for a major loop. Some of my best friends are going through a personal crisis, and while there are going to be upsides to this whole ordeal, it's very difficult on all of us in the short run. Which, of course, means no time for me to write!

It has gotten me thinking though. My post yesterday (which only made it up because I wrote it Monday lol) talked about my experience with The Fault In Our Stars Tour and about living a life that is awesome, and the biggest thing I took away from the book that tour promotes is that life does not have to be going well for it to be awesome. So how can you be awesome when the people you love face hard times?

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1. Give of Yourself

This can many different things because we all have different ways that we communicate and differing abilities and resources, but what that act is isn't really important. What's important is that you do something real, genuine, because people instinctively can spot fakes. Give flowers, take them out for a cup of coffee, write them a poem, send an email, do the dishes, just make sure its from your heart and not just some sense of obligation.

2. Be Realistic

When the people you love are hurting it is easy to want to save their world, but the truth is that usually you can't. You may be able to do some incredible things to help, but the truth is we all have our limitations, and there are some things that people have to work through themselves. As you are sitting there trying to figure out what you can do, be honest about your limitations. Maybe you can make a meal, but your not up to babysitting. Maybe your on the opposite side of the country and you can't be there, but you can still write or call. Maybe you can write a check or maybe all you can do is hold them while they cry. Don't feel bad about what you can't do, because everything you can do when someone is hurting is amazing!

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3. Take Care of Yourself

You are no good to anybody if you wear yourself to the bone, and this one is extra important if you are closely involved with the situation. Don't forget to eat, drink some water, sleep, and take care of your self emotionally too. I think that last one is often the hardest, especially for someone like me who likes to take care of everyone else! You are important too, so call a friend, allow yourself an extra treat, take a bubble bath, but never forget to take care of you. 

4. Don't Be Afraid to Laugh

Laughter really is the best medicine, and when you can find humor through the dark times, you'll make it through to the other side in much better shape. Granted, a funeral isn't always the best place to laugh, but then again, sometimes it is. You'll know what is appropriate, but don't ever loose site of the funny side of the dark.

~ Ruthie ~

Ps. I'll try to post tomorrow, but until this is all "over" I have no idea really what day to day is going to look like. 

The Fault in Our Stars Tour

On the 29th Gordon (my brother - ie - the guy in the orange hat in the picture with me) and I went to the Fault in Our Stars Tour and I have been wanting to talk about it ever since! Ahhhhh!

Yes, this is the awesome thing I've been wanting to talk about for the last week. Well, the start of the awesomeness.

Backing up, The Fault in Our Stars Tour is the book signing tour of author John Green, but it was also so much more than that!

John and his brother Hank make up the Youtube team the Vlogbrothers. A Vlog is a video blog, and they are brothers, so it's a perfect name! These two guys are very, very smart, and awesome. They are one of the more well known vloggers (among people who watch these things) and they call their followers the Nerfighters.

Yes, I said Nerdfighters. No, not those who beat up nerds (who we can safely call losers), but nerds who fight "To increase world AWESOME and decrease world suck." Anywhere you see DFTBA pop up (Don't Forget To Be Awesome) you are seeing the influence of these Nerdfighters.

Let me let you in on a little secret, in case you hadn't guessed it yet, I'm a giant nerd. When I was younger I took great pleasure in sitting and reading our junior encyclopedia, I am a writer who thinks nothing is more awesome than being in a room full of other writers all talking about writing, I love Star Trek, Star Wars, and most all things fantasy and sci fi related, and I've been known to craft in weird places.

Remember this picture? I was knitting while listening to the guys talk and Hank sing. Getting back to the tour itself, the tour was a combination of promotion and signings of John's latest book (The Fault in Our Stars), John gave a talk, Hank sang, and of course, there was lots of nerdyness. Everywhere you looked there was nerdyness. People talking about Dr. Who (I saw a knit cap that looked like the Tardis!), singing songs about particle physics, and screams. Lots of screams and yells and cheers and goofy dancing.

Guess what? They even made a video with footage from the event we were at! No, I'm not in the video.

Now one of the things that John (the one who wrote the book) talked about was, well, living an awesome life. That is, after all, one of their main focuses! It really got me thinking. Is my life awesome? Why or why not? Then I read the book and...

Well that's a story for anther post. What? Yes, I'm not going to delve deeper into my thoughts on living an awesome life today because I have a lot I want to say. So, aside from my updates on how my writing life is going, I'm going to focus on this for a few posts (maybe many posts). Check back, join in the discussion, and leave me your thoughts, I'd love to hear them :)

~ Ruthie ~

Ps. I'm having blog comment problems and we are not sure why. Feel free to send me a message at jedimarri(at)gmail(dot)com instead. We are in the middle of a family crisis so I haven't had time to contact blogger about it yet. Any information you can give me will be useful when I am able to contact them. Thanks!

This is Not a Super Witty Post

Nope, this is not a witty or exciting post, but I did find an awesome picture which I put on the left. Go check out where I got it and show the creator some love :)

Now on to business! I know my last post was a week ago. Ooops. Life goes on eh?

I have some blog posts in planning, but none of them are quiet solid enough for me to put them up tonight, mostly because my brain isn't behaving and performing for me (dance monkey, dance!).

What's coming? Awesomeness, deep thought, hopefully some discussion with you (the people of blog land), and possibly a contest.

That's really all I have to say tonight. Yes, I know, there's no content tonight other than a little teaser. I just couldn't go another day without posting! I really do miss you guys even though I'm the one who's been awol, here's hoping life continues to improve so I am here more...cuz I really am excited about some of my upcoming posts!

~ Ruthie ~